sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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