i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Randomize