I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
I looked at my own cervix.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Randomize
