508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Randomize