Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
Redeem this text for a blowjob
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
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