Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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