Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Randomize
