oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize
