if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
