Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
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