why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Randomize
