epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
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