also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
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