I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
