i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Randomize
