the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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