he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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