I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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