the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
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