it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize