so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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