its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Randomize
