and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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