At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
