i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
