ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Randomize
