I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
