This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
ugly people sure do ruin things
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize