Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Randomize
