Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Randomize
