Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Randomize
