I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
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