You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
