Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
