That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
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