He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
why do cheetos always look like penises
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
