You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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