One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
