You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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