Walk of Shame. In a state park.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
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