shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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