I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
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