That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
