then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Also, beer. Big fan.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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