I molested 6 butterflies tonight
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Randomize