the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
