So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
