Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
