I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Randomize
