How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
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