Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
You work out of a Hotel?
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
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